When I was potty training you boys did I hold up a picture of a fire hose and say, “Like this…all over the bathroom, okay?”
When I taught you to put your clothes away did I say, “The folded clothes go back in the dirty hamper and the dirty underwear go everywhere?”
When I showed you how to put the dishes away did I hide all the utensils in various drawers around the kitchen and stick some in the dog food bin?
Have I ever said it was okay to not clean up after yourself? Yes, I must have said that, so often in fact that you are completely dedicated to NEVER cleaning up after yourself.
Is there a single puzzle or game in our house that has all its pieces? No, because I taught you to lose them, break them and scatter them like rose petals in the yard.
Who can find their shoes? Nobody…I taught you well.
Who has their coat and mittens? Nobody…I’m a success!
Who put their toothbrush on the counter and spit blobs of toothpaste in the sink? My children…I’m so proud!
Who is hungry the minute I put the last dish back in the refrigerator? Okay… that’s me and I’ve taught you all that too.
How much longer are you all going to live in this house with me? Don’t answer that.
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April, I feel your pain! But, I have lost one to college this year and another one leaves next year, and that pain is even greater!
I just found your website, and I love it! I really enjoy and appreciate your wit and humor.
You and I lead parallel lives! Let me add one and see if it applies to you also: When I hand you something to go put away and tell you where to put it, you end up dumping it just around the corner from where I’m standing – I taught my kids that trick!
You are a hoot!
NotMe lives at my house and does these sorts of things. If I ever see him, he’s a goner.
OH MY GOD! APRIL!
I have this rant on occasion too! (sadly, it’s usually about once a month
I can relate and am so relieved that so many of us have used the same parenting techniques.
In a fit I’ve often asked my family to share their time management tips with me because how they manage to get all “their work” done and still have so much time to watch TV, etc. I must be “doing something wrong”.
Had this conversation with a friend of mine recently. We decided our #1 goal has to be to make them self sufficient and NOT DO STUFF FOR THEM THAT THEY SHOULD BE DOING THEM SELVES!!! Actually following through with that is the challenge.
Thanks for a very funny and painfully true post!! Have a great weekend!