I cleaned my basement a few weeks ago and found an old video camera with a VCR tape still in it. You know those giant video cameras we used back in the day? You could hook it up directly to the TV and watch the tapes? And they weigh twenty pounds? Remember how folks looked so ridiculous with it hoisted up on their shoulder while squinting through the lens and half the time they forgot to press the record button? Remember those? So, we set up the VCR and watched ourselves from a decade ago when my oldest child was five and my first son was three. I know it was NO TV MONTH, but we couldn’t help our curiosity. I can’t believe how much has happened to us in ten years.
We bought the ugliest house in the world when we moved to St. Louis. There was teal carpet in the kitchen and everything had been repaired with Liquid Nails. The first four years in that house were dark and dreary. I spent a lot of time dreaming about what our lives would be like in ten years, mostly while crying because the roof was leaking or the faucet broke off in my hand or the garage door collapsed or I spilled a huge bowl of vinaigrette on the teal carpet and watched in disbelief as it was soaked up never to be seen again..
We lived in that house for almost six years. When I walked out the front door for the last time I said, “Good ridance!” and never shed a tear because that house had wrung enough tears, sweat and blood from me and I was happy to leave it behind. We did all the renovations to that house with our own hands. I was eight months pregnant rolling out builder’s felt on the roof as fast as my bloated body would allow while Clay tacked it down because a huge storm was on it’s way and the roof needed to be covered or we would be dealing with more than just a couple leaks.
We tore out that hideously foul smelling teal carpet and had planned to put down some hard wood floors, but that led to taking out the cabinets and redoing the lights and installing a dishwasher and, and, and…..a few months later we had a brand new kitchen courtesy of my whining and nagging and crying and begging and complete confidence that we could figure out how to do all of it ourselves. And we did. Now Clay knows how to install plumbing and electrical and hardwood floors and hang cabinets and here’s the best part…..we’re still married and we really do like each other.
I swore I would never-ever-ever live through another kitchen remodel. We had our fridge on the back porch for so long that it took several weeks before we stopped sliding open the door to step outside for some milk after the remodel was complete. I have no idea how I cooked meals, but we were not eating out so we could save any extra money to pay for the kitchen. So I must have been pretty creative, but I’ve decided not to remember any of it.
It’s still very difficult for me to hire anybody to do any type of work that I think we can figure out ourselves. And by that I mean I usually do a lot of research and then while we sit on the couch I start scratching Clay’s back I speak in a soft, loving voice about how I was reading about the simple ways you can build a chicken tractor or rewire your entire house or install a water heater, heat pump, toilette, roof, garage door, tile floor, drywall, garbage disposal, dishwasher, cabinets, canned lights, butcher chickens, raise pigs, build a coop, build raised garden beds…you get the idea.
And with all those things he thinks for a bit, he reads, he ponders and then, eventually he does it. A few times he’s had to call in help. But, he’s pretty darn handy and I’m a great cheerleader.
Except in the garden. That is where he draws the line. One time I asked him to go pick a pepper for me and he came back with a tomato. He’s constantly asking me, “What flower is this?” my answer more often than not is, “That’s a weed.”
When we went to the Peony and Iris farm earlier this summer he was overwhelmed by the beauty of these flowers. He grabbed the camera away from me and snapped photos of the plants as I diligently scanned the price sheet. Clay eventually decided the white peony was his favorite because it smelled so good. I totally agreed, but could not decide between the pinks and the pale peaches and oh the coral they were all so beautiful.
You order the plants to be dug in the fall and this helped me decide that maybe I didn’t need a Peony row right now. So we left with none.
This is how we operate these days. No impulse purchases. Nothing can be whined about enough to cause us to open our wallets.
I can live without these pretty plants for a bit longer. But, that chicken tractor? I’ll be scratching Clay’s back tonight.
Need a Chicken Doctor?
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Umm, what’s a chicken tractor? I am going to google that…
I love that! Our remodel has been dragging on for 5 years (without an end in sight). I went 8 months without a kitchen sink and that was my most favorite Christmas present ever! Now my husband just rolls his eyes and gets ready to work whenever I say, “So, I’ve been thinking about the house and…”
But, the best part is that yes, we’re still married and we too, still like each other (a lot).
I do believe you just gave the defination of lasting love. Its not the hearts & flowers, its the 3am feedings & feeding a family of 3-4-5-6-on $10.00! Now you say… remember when we! If you can still say it to each other, as in…. your still together….THATs love.!
You can scope out the flowers in town….you can always go back at 3am! Or, let folks know at church….they will be happy to share
Great post as always!
I’m impressed with your restraint! My husband and I are also doing Dave’s Total Money Makeover, and it’s hard. But oh, so worth it. I can’t wait til everything is paid off!
I do have to argue with the DIY drywall. Drywall is the canvas on which the rest of the home sits. Bad drywall just looks like bad drywall. And as my husband is a professional so we’d be happy to take a trip to help you out with that. Where “we” equals my husband. And “we” really means I”d put my feet up and enjoy the Midwest wile he works.
Oh my gosh…I was laughing so hard my eyes are still watering at the “pepper/tomato” part. You two sound like my hubby and I. The other day I said, “Wow, the nasturtiums are really looking good.” And my husband turned to the tomato patch and said, “Yeah. Wow. They are.” That’s OK…as long as he turns our terrible soil for me and builds me chicken coops and tractors…it’s all good.
I, too, have found that back scratches are the best way to get your to-do list started! Hire help?! Nah, us either! I am amazed at how much hubby has learned and can do by himself! With the exception of cooking…that’s another story!
Love you site April! Our 116 year old money pit, er, farm house, caught fire during an ice storm! Luckily we did not have to do the rehab, the insurance company took care of it! It was quite sad, though, to see all the work we had done, go down the drain! If you are still in St. Louis (?), contact me and I will give you some peonies. I have plenty and they need to be divided, and I think the white ones smell the best also!! Good luck on your chicken tractor!
My dad hatched turkeys and built himself a turkey tractor….he loves it, and I have to admit, it is the handiest thing. He made his pretty big, since the turkeys will get bigger than a chicken would, but it still moves fairly easy. Demand Clay build you one…or is the back scratching what keeps the peace???
Great post April. We have some peonies I will be dividing this fall if you want some let me know.
Get as much out of him now while you can. After twenty plus years of it they start getting poo-ed out and aren’t so inclined to say “okay, honey.”
I speak from experience.
And peonies are my favorite!
you can have some irises for the asking
You do the back scratch thing, too?
Shhhh…. we mustn’t let this get back to them!
As I type, my incredible husband is putting an “addition” onto the chicken coop the house the “few extra” (30) chicks I thought we ought to add to the flock this year… The “addition” will effectively double the size of the coop.
Did I mention that my husband is incredible yet? Sounds like he and Clay would get along just fine! (Architect, meet Engineering Tech – aka AutoCAD expert dude… yep. I’m thinking they’d be pals!)
Why do I think that it might take a little more than a back scratch to get the chicken tractor thing?
I have a huge clump of peonies in my back yard. Two clumps, in fact.
I HATE them. HATE. White-hot hate. They gack me.
This fall I will dig them up and send them to you.
Email me your snail mail addy.
So, hmmm, help out this apt. dweller – I’m assuming a chicken tractor is a tiny little tractor that a chicken can pull? Or do you teach them to drive it? Love your stories! And I really like the flower photos, especially #5.
aaah april, i remember that house! i remember you on the roof whist pregnant. mom drove by and came home and told us. i remember you remodeling the kitchen. i loved when we lived so close to y’all! i was very sad when you moved away, i know you weren’t, but i missed you!! remember, i would come pick you up and we would go over to mary grace’s with annie hiers and julie and we would watch survivor and eat yummy pizza….*sigh* those were the days….
Aww Becky,
Those were fun days. I miss you too sweetie.
Why don’t you get some seed or cuttings and grow some perennials yourself? It is a lot cheaper. I am not much of a peony fan. I love how they look but the one that came with the house is always covered in ants and the blooms don’t last that long. I prefer perennials that have a longer blooming season. Good luck with your garden.
You know he picked a tomato on purpose instead of a pepper so he wouldn’t be asked to do such tasks again.
Wow, the amount of remodeling you did on your own is impressive. Don’t we always do that to a house just in time to move away?
Chicken tractor on your wish list? Look for scrap wood—it can often be had for free or nearly free. Go to a part of town where they are building brand new houses. The scrap pile of wood will be obvious. Just ask the contractor if you can have some, I’m sure he’ll say yes. If he says no, just wait ’til everyone is gone for the night and ‘borrow’ some from the heap.
I totally agree that if you can figure out how to do it, then do it yourself and save the money. As for the flowers, I told my husband that i don’t need to spend money on flowers because i can enjoy them everywhere I go.
) Have a blessed and safe July 4th!
BTW, My family loved the blackberry salad with walnuts and feta cheese with the blackberry vinegrette. I am going to do a version this weekend using blueberries since they were 99 cents for a quart at Aldi.
Charlotte
What a great love story! I am new to your blog. My daughter has a blog and that has gotten me reading and enjoying others.