I’m so glad I don’t have to stick to topics on this blog. Because uh, my brain tis scrambled.
What should I write about?
I’m too lazy to go take pictures of the bench I brought in from the porch last night. You see, my teeny tiny baby boy has out grown his cute red stool that he sits on at the table and we don’t have six chairs, so I thought I’d bring in the bench and use it at the table for my two little boys. But, there is a problem. It smells like cat pee. I know. Everything I own smells like cat pee. My father HATES cats. I’m beginning to smell why.
There is a dead chicken in my front yard……..again. It’s the little rooster I found on the side of the road. He didn’t stay in the coop with the other chickens, so it was just a matter of time. Poor little guy.
Okay, that’s it. That’s all I have.
What if I did an Ask April post? What the heck would you ask me? Please don’t ask me about football, basketball, baseball, volleyball or anything pertaining to a ball.
Ooooh, I just read that Dooce is 5’11” tall!!! I had no idea she was that tall. She looks like a tiny pip squeak, but then again, so do I, right? RIGHT?!
Q: April, what is the first thing you notice about a person?
A: Their height.
See? I could answer questions like that. Easy peasy.
Q: April, when you were young and single what did you find was the most attractive quality in a man?
A: His height.
Q: So were you immediately attracted to your 6’5″ husband?
A: Uh, er, um. No.
Q: Why the hell not?
A: Sigh. Because he was goofy looking. And I had a boyfriend. But, I did become good friends with Clay and took him to meet my sister in hopes that they would fall in love because she had a thing for red heads with green eyes.
Q: So did Clay fall for Rechelle when you introduced them?
A: No. The only person that did any falling was me. Clay and I were walking back to my dorm to eat dinner after watching half of a KU basketball game because I was so not interested in sports back then, uh I guess that hasn’t changed. Anyway, Clay had noticed that I was bored during the game so he asked me if I wanted to leave and of course I said, “Yes, this is awful.” Then he very tentatively asked, “Uh, do you want me to go with you?” I laughed and said, “Well, sure if you don’t mind missing the game.” We decided to cut across campus to make our walk shorter. Taking the short cut meant walking down a very steep grassy hill that was wet from the recent melted snow. I started down that hill taking tiny little steps and then it was as if I had strapped on a pair of skis. I was slipping and sliding all the while staying on my feet and screaming like someone was attacking me. Clay was at the top trying not to watch, it was painful for him. I finally ended up on my butt in a puddle of water and mud. I felt so stupid, but I was laughing because what else could I do? Then I heard Clay beside me asking if I was okay. He helped me up and then said, “Here, you better hold my hand.” And that was his first slick move. He’s still very proud of that moment. He had no idea that he’d spend the rest of his life watching me fall, slip, slide and best of all scream. He still holds my hand, but now he laughs at me and then imitates me everytime I fall.
Hey, I kinda like answering these questions. I guess practicing all those interviews with Katie Couric in the bathroom mirror has paid off.