We did a little fancy-schmancy-froo-froo-dilly-wap of a hoop-dee-do project last night. I’ll try to show you the whole process later gater.
Today’s question is; April, why are there two burners missing from your cooktop?
Answer: Because my cat peed on them.
I swear I am drenched in urine everyday. Every single DAY!
I turned on the burner to heat up some water to boil and was accosted by that awful ammonia smell that is known solely as CAT PEE! After the flesh on my face had melted and my nostrils sucked themselves down into my gut I quickly dismantled the stove and washed everything in sight.
You see, I have a cat. Her name is Dixie. She has urinary tract problems if she eats the wrong foods. She’s been eating the dog’s food for about a week because I kept forgetting to get her ‘special’ food for her.
Dixie doesn’t like to be ignored.
Dixie is no dummy.
She peed on the stove.
SHE PEED ON THE STOVE!!!
So, how does that make you feel? Better about yourself?
This is my job people, I aim to make you look better. Just wait until I tell you about my Ugly Betty hair do and my first ever brow wax from hell. You will look in the mirror with a heart of thankfulness and everyone around you will look so lovely…. unless I’m in the room with my Ugly Betty do and freaky eyebrows.
Okay, now if you’ll excuse me I need to go sit in some urine and then maybe I’ll get to writing that post about pretzels dipped in urine…. wait… that’s not right. I mean pretzels dipped in chocolate urine.
Just kiddin‘, come on.








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Oh, good lord! Too funny! And yucky, you crack me up, and you really do make me feel better.
I’b sooooo sowwy (said with a clothes pin on my nose).
I had to put my kitty outside because she was peeing on EVERYTHING! I have a bag full of laundry I keep pretending isn’t there, that has cat pee on it. I don’t think it will ever come out. Maybe with bleach?
I have a funny (for me, not dh) story about an inside cat I had (he died, poor dear, at the age of 14). Anyway, he was mine before I married my dh, and I’m not sure if he was jealous or what, but everytime he’d get mad he’d pee on Steve’s (only Steve’s, never mine) side of the bed. He did it about 5 times and then got the boot to the big outdoors..no really, outdoors, not a euphamism for heaven or anything.
It says a lot for my husband’s character that the cat died of natural causes at the age of 14!
Good luck with your pee problems!
OH! One more story that I remember now that we are talking about pee: I saw a pair of boys’ boxers with the word “Wii” written all over it. I told my kids that the only thing worse than Wii on your underwear was Pooh. Sorry. I’ll leave now.
Oh NO. But, you’re right, I do feel better about my peeing cat.
Hey, I’ve seen your new hair do and it IS u….tterly lovely. And so’s your right eyebrow.
Our outdoor cat must’ve crawled up in my car’s engine one night for warmth (Why do they DO that? This caused a tragedy once at my grandma’s house that I’ll spare you from, but it scarred me for life)and she must’ve peed while camping out because the next morning when I turned the car’s heater on, I got a very strong and distinctive blast of cat pee smell in my face. No matter what we tried to do to the car after that, even have it professionally cleaned, I still had the ghost of cat pee smell whenever the A/C or heater was turned on. Complete nightmare.
I swear cat piss is thee worst smell and hardest to get rid of. We donated one our cats sorrowfully to a friend’s farm for that reason. She peed on our bed not once , but twice while we were sleeping!!
We have 3 rejects at my husband’s clinic that came in to be euthanized for yep, inapropriate urination. My husband is a sucker and saved them from the blue juice. Now we have these fat mousers that roam our clinic’s back room, and they use their litter boxes. Go figure. Hope you get your cat figured out. Possibly another vet visit?
Okay April. I am dying. From laughter. I know it must be true, bc no one could make that up.
You and me and MrsMama! Cat and dog pee seems to be going around. My old dog has a bladder infection. I keep trying to sniff out pee in the house.
You can give her cranberry capsules, which will kick the infection, if you can figure out how to sneak them into a cat. That one’s much easier with a dog. And go forth and get her the right food! I guarantee it will be easier than the Great Pee Hunt.
Loved your story! Will check my burners when I get home.
I made my husband take the cedar bushes out our front yard. Because everytime the dog brushed against them, it smelled like cat urine. YUCK!
We have three cats (god only knows why), and one of them is now an outside cat. Because she likes my daughter’s room, and not to sleep in.
Good luck.
Even dogs aren’t THAT spiteful. Gross!
I sit in urine daily too. But I don’t have a cat, so you win. Your cat sounds evil. My sweet dog would NEVER do something like that.
well…your cat sure makes my bad cat look better.
If you ever invite me over for dinner, I’ll pick up take out for us…
Oh my gosh…I thought I was the only one with a cat the peed on the stove!! My daughter’s cat will pee on anything if he gets his little nose out of joint….he peed on the stove top, the kitchen hand towel ( and my hubby wiped his face with it….rather funny if you ask me, but he didn’t think so), peed in the bathtub, on the bathmat, in the bathroom sink,He even peed on the corless phone and it fried it!!He is banished to a kennel now if we are out of the house and at night. Why are cats so vengeful??????
I had a cat with a UTI. It used to pee on my boyfriends chair. He really hated my bf. Once he decided his job was done with bf chair he started pooping in his shoes. Once I got rid of bf he stopped this behavior. He was a very WISE cat.
Ummmm….yesterday, I left a comment about how I wish I had your children in my class so I could get homemade soup and bread…after today’s story, I think that I’ve changed my mind. JK!
My 3-yr. old just grew out of that peeing on everything stage. We had to replace the living room rug, two bathroom rugs, and a couch cushion. But I must say, he never peed on the burners.
Obviously you are not alone with the inappropriately peeing cat. I see plenty of us have this problem. If my son leaves a towel crumpled on the bathroom counter, the cat will pee on it. If he folds the towel, no problem, she leaves it alone. If he leaves his laundry on his floor, which seems to be a habit as well, the cat will pee on it. Doesn’t matter if it’s dirty or clean laundry. Point being … fold the dang towels and put your laundry away son! Life would be so much nicer … smelling that is!
Oh, I’m sorry! I woke to a sound in the middle of the night that made me just out of bed in nothing flat – - – - – my dog peeing on my floor by the bed!
ACK!
I feel you pain, but not too much. That’s the 2nd time he’s peed in the house so I shouldn’t whine. But 3:30 in the AM??? Grrrr
In our house a cat with a peeing problem becomes someone elses problem. Does that make me a cold hearted pet owner?
I was craving chocolate covered pretzels after seeing the picture…but after a post about cat pee I think I will pass!
You owe it to your cat to put her in a crate and give her the food she needs and keep her there till she is well. We did, and now our cat is well again and can roam the house.
Can I just say . . . . EEEEWWWWWW!
Uhm…wow. Have to say that’s a new onoe for me. I’ve heard of cats peeing in odd places when they’re upset, but the stove? Wow…
The poor cate. Please get her the proper food.
The poor cate. Please get her the proper food.
Oh, my gosh! I had a cat that did that one time to my stove! Just like you I turned on the burner, smelled that awful stench, and knew what he’d done. To this day I can’t figure out why he’d urinate on the stove top. (he was neutered and didn’t have a bladder infection or anything like that) I had to get new burners and scrub the heck out of the stove with bleach, then I sprayed it with Lysol.
We have another cat now, a female, who had terrible ear infections. I cleaned out her ears and put the medication down in there, and she promptly stalked into my bedroom and peed on my bed. Think she was mad at me?
Oh, my gosh! I had a cat that did that one time to my stove! Just like you I turned on the burner, smelled that awful stench, and knew what he’d done. To this day I can’t figure out why he’d urinate on the stove top. (he was neutered and didn’t have a bladder infection or anything like that) I had to get new burners and scrub the heck out of the stove with bleach, then I sprayed it with Lysol.
We have another cat now, a female, who had terrible ear infections. I cleaned out her ears and put the medication down in there, and she promptly stalked into my bedroom and peed on my bed. Think she was mad at me?
I think I’d cry openly if I had cat urine on a burner.
But then, I’d cry if I had a cat. (Allergic)
I think I’d cry openly if I had cat urine on a burner.
But then, I’d cry if I had a cat. (Allergic)
I can get a whole tub at Aldi? Fantabulous! I’m going!
I usually have to buy bags of brokern ones.
I’m so glad I don’t have a cat.
I think Dixie is begging to be made a true farm cat. Just put her outside and make sure there’s some hay bales somewhere for her to burrow down into.
I am not sure if it was in this post or the next one you mentioned a can of Comet used to clean up the cat pee. I thought a heads up on the Comet might be a good thing. Years ago my mother washed a hard plastic suitcase with Comet. One of our male cats fell in LUST with the thing. He started rubbing all over it and meowing and trying to hump the suitcase.
I am not sure what effect Comet has on female cats but if it smells like a female cat in heat that may explain why your cat is peeing on the stove.
You might try another cleanser and see if the problem goes away.
Good luck.