*Update on Miss Pastey Hiney*
I know you all have been praying and loosing sleep over our Buff Orpington with the prolapsed pooper shooter. I think you should know that I stuck my fingers up that chicken THREE times before she got better. The third day she prolapsed I decided I had to take a different approach than the honey on the hiney. I used sugar instead of honey, genius I know. I also slathered her with vegetable oil and poured oil and 1/8th of an Ibuprofen in her food. I guess you could say she had her oil changed and a lube job to boot. Today when I checked on her she had laid TWO eggs and had managed to keep her crapolotic inside her poopmoreola. So there ya go, I can heal a chicken. Rechelle and I have discussed renaming my blog to “One Sick Chicken”, but that doesn’t apply anymore, so there.
This is our first dozen eggs. They are very cute and tiny.
See? I can fit all of them in one hand. Uh, do I need to mention that I do sorta have large-ish hands, but still.
I also dropped one on the wood floor right after I took this photo. You know what? It didn’t break!!! That my friend is the sign of a good egg, it should have a nice hard shell. I ate a big bowl of scrambled eggs this morning. My daughter ate some too and after a couple bites she said, “Mom, you want these?”
No. Aren’t you hungry?
“Yeah, I’m hungry, but scrambled eggs give me a headache.”
What? Do fried eggs give you headache?
“Nope, just scrambled.”
Is it me or is my daughter a bit weird?
Need a Chicken Doctor?
Contact 
I’m not even gonna lie, honey…I have to wait until there is no food in sight and I’m not hungry at all before reading up on you. My faint heart can’t deal with the whole sticking your hand up the chicken’s arse…..nope, not at all. This is why I own a gun…here chick chick chick….
On the other hand (the clean one) I’m just amazed at how calm and cool you are under pressure…..dang
If it was me I would have politely asked the chicken to take care of itself. I can’t handle the natural side of life. I want pretty all the time.
My daughter used to call headaches, “head-icks”.
Hi April! I gave you an award on my July 28th blog entry. Check it out.
I’m so impressed you did this three times with the chicken arse. I’m sure the chicken didn’t mind.
Glad to hear the eggs are nice and study!
One sick chicken is a great name for your blog. And, yes, your child is a little strange, but I can see where she gets it. hehe
Girl you are crackin me up. HILARIOUS! Your one tough farm woman, how bout becomming a vet?
I am so proud of you that you didn’t see something “gross” in the chicken’s hiney, but a pathetic creature in need. A true woman who rose to the occasion!
And lovely pullet eggs. As the hens age and their eggs enlarge, we called the eggs “henopausal.”
My son had a wonderful Buff Orphington named Bulah. They are one of my favorite chick-chick breeds. Have you ever seen The American Standard of Perfection? It has all the different chicken breeds in it.
Hooray for your eggs. I remember the day we got our first egg from our chickens. We were so excited! There is just something so calming to me about going to the henhouse and gathering the eggs. Its a little surprise everyday to see how many you will get.
Our chickens recently started laying eggs too. It’s so cool to go out and find little treasures in the morning! Glad your pasty-butt girl is better.
~the other April
How fun! I am glad that the chicken is doing better (I don’t know if I needed to see more pictures of “the procedure!”)
You made me hungry for scrambled eggs . . .
You’re a girl of many talents! Just think how your expertise would look on a resume; ya just never know what skills people are lookin’ for these days!
Your eggs are beautiful. Our friends have a little boy that calls headaches “Haddocks”!! LOL
Thanks for the daily laugh.
*HUGS*
Bertie
I can’t wait to find out what happens next. I am completely intrigued. I know that makes me really consider therapy, but I love your posts! Scrambled eggs give me headaches too…she ain’t so weird and neither are you!
…and THIS is why I want to raise chickens?
http://weblog.xanga.com/Madewyn/668138801/i-must-be-out-of-my-mind.html
~Mad
Yay! I can’t wait until we get some eggs from our 9 lovlies (5 Rhode Island Reds and 4 Brown Leghorns). Congrats! I’m glad the prolapsed pooper shooter is fixed, maybe this time it’ll stick.
Glad to hear the patient is doing well… Also glad she is still ‘producing’. lol!
Great job on the eggs. I wonder how the honey or sugar is supposed to help keep her hiney intact. Gives a new meaning to honey on my toast.
April,
I come here when I am feeling down just to get a laugh and perk up!
Dea
MYLINDA!!!!
Honey, I tried to go to your sight and I can’t. Please, please, please come back and give me your URL. And if you don’t then Thankyou.
The Other April,
I think it is very sweet and humble for you to call yourself ‘the other’ and Clay thinks that’s funny.
-THE April
Nah, I just didn’t want to confuse your readers with my comments. Google signs my name just plain april, like you. And it IS your blog. Here, you are THE April.
~ other April
Love the post about the chicken’s prolapsed you-know-what! Also glad to hear that you used sugar. I used to work in a vet’s office and, ironically, also had the (unfortunate) luck of helping with a prolapsed uterus on an emu. Anyhoo…sugar is what the vet recommended. I thought it was crazy but it took the swelling down big time. Good for you, you Chicken Whisperer!
About the headaches from scrambled eggs…You might tell your daughter to eat MORE eggs from your chicken. The ibuprofen you fed the chicken might help. j/k.