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The Living Without Series

This is a series of posts that I wrote back in 2006 on living with less stuff. Check them out: liv011Living #2liv031liv04

Coal Creek Farm on Facebook

The Chicken Doctor


The Architect


Elephant Droppings

Because the small details of my life are important to you. Yes they are. Yes they are. Are too. Are too, infinity!

One or both of our toilettes are clogged nearly every single day. I’m serious. This is not one of my exaggerations to make a better story……uh, I mean, I’m telling the truth here, no lie!
C- Which one of our boys put the huge turd in the toilet and clogged it up?
A- Levi
C- It looks like an elephant dropping!
A- I know. He was complaining that his back hurt while he pushed it out, but he’s fine now.
C- Good, lord.
I have boys that clog the toilet with their huge elephant turds. Every. Ding. Dang. DAY!
How do I cope with this awful daily event? I ignore it. I don’t acknowledge the incident, until Clay asks me if I’m aware that all the toilets are clogged. Yes, I know. Then he looks at me, furrows his brow, squints his eyes, bites his bottom lip and heads out to the barn to get the plunger…….until I suggested he might want to keep it in the basement, since, you know, he needs to use it so often.
Since I’m of no assistance in the de-clogging effort, Clay has decided to teach the parties responsible for the nuisance how to unclog the toilet. The first lesson sounded a bit like this;
“No, no you put this end of the plunger in the toilet. DON’T SWING IT AROUND! Wait, wait, don’t touch anything with it!”
That’s about all I could stand to hear, so I tuned out any other useful tips that I may have gained in the art of elephant turd extraction.
Today, after the latest offense Clay called to me from the kitchen.
C- April, come here.
A- No.
C- April, come here.
A- I said, NO.
C- April, come here.
A- If your making me come look at that giant turd, I’m not coming!
C- April, come here.
A- I don’t want to learn how to use a plunger.
C- April, come here.
A- If this has anything to do with that toilet….I’m not doing it.
C-April, come here.
A- I’m not participating in anything that’s has to do with poop!
C-April……..come here.
A- sigh (realizing he’s not going to give up) FINE! WHAT?

C-We’re making cookies.


C- What can I use instead of brown sugar?

A- Are you going to make me unclog the toilet?

C- No.

So, I gave him the sugar he could use and he made cookies with his kids. Then he unclogged the toilet….until tomorrow. And I didn’t have to do a darn thing. Life is good.

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